The charts below show the percentage of people aged 23-65 in different occupations in one UK town (Ashby) and in the UK as a whole in 2008.

Percentage of people aged 23-65 in different occupations in one UK town Ashby and in UK as a whole in 2008 - IELTS Writing Task 1

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

A student's answer to this task, and the feedback on it

Written by an IELTSX user under exam conditions and published unedited and anonymously. Band 6.5 · 156 words.

The pie charts compare the percentages of people aged 23–65 working in different occupations in the UK town of Ashby and in the UK as a whole in 2008.

Overall, personal service and office work accounted for the largest proportions in the UK, while these occupations represented smaller shares in Ashby. By contrast, unskilled and professional work made up the smallest percentages in both locations.

In Ashby, personal service was the most common occupation, accounting for 21% of workers, followed by office work at 18%. Technical work represented 16%, while both shop work and construction work each made up 14%. The smallest shares were recorded for unskilled and professional work, at 9% and 8%, respectively.

In the UK as a whole, personal service and office work occupied much larger proportions than in Ashby, whereas technical, construction, and shop work accounted for smaller shares. Unskilled and professional work remained the least common occupations in the given year.

Examiner feedback

The response is well-structured and clear, with an appropriate overview and logical grouping of information. However, the description of the UK statistics is purely qualitative; adding specific figures for the UK as a whole would significantly strengthen the Task Achievement score.

Task Achievement - 6

- The response covers all requirements of the task and presents a relevant overview. - Key features are highlighted; however, the UK section lacks specific numerical data to support the comparisons made. - While trends are identified, the lack of figures in the final paragraph prevents it from being a fully 'illustrated' response.

Coherence & Cohesion - 7

- Information is logically organized by location (Ashby then the UK) which provides a clear progression. - Cohesive devices like 'By contrast', 'respectively', and 'whereas' are used effectively to link ideas. - Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the specific data descriptions.

Lexical Resource - 7

- Vocabulary is sufficient to describe the charts accurately, using terms like 'proportions', 'shares', and 'recorded'. - There is some flexibility in word choice (e.g., 'occupied', 'represented'). - To reach a higher band, more sophisticated synonyms for 'work' or 'occupations' and more nuanced descriptive adjectives could be used.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy - 7

- A variety of complex structures is used, including comparative clauses and lists. - Grammar and punctuation are generally well-controlled with no major errors identified. - Sentence forms are mostly accurate, though could benefit from more varied ways of expressing proportions beyond 'accounting for'.

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