The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian children in three age groups who participated in four different activities in 2012.

Percentage of Australian children in three age groups who participated in four different activities in 2012 - IELTS Writing Task 1

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

A student's answer to this task, and the feedback on it

Written by an IELTSX user under exam conditions and published unedited and anonymously. Band 8 · 218 words.

The bar chart compares the percentage of Australian children across three different age groups (5–8, 9–11, and 12–16 years old) who participated in four distinct activities in 2018.

Overall, watching TV was the most popular activity among the youngest group, while riding bikes and watching TV attracted the highest participation from the oldest teenagers. Conversely, playing computer games was generally the least popular pastime, particularly among the oldest age group.

Watching TV and Reading:

Watching television was highly popular across all cohorts. It peaked among 5–8-year-olds at nearly 95%, while exactly 80% of children in both older age groups took part in it. In contrast, participation in reading showed a slight upward trend with age. Around 65% of the youngest children read, compared to a steady 70% for both the 9–11 and 12–16 age brackets.

Computer Games and Bike Riding:

An inverse relationship can be seen in computer gaming, which declined as children grew older. While 60% of 5–8-year-olds and roughly 56% of 9–11-year-olds played computer games, this figure dropped sharply to just 40% for the 12–16 youth group. On the other hand, riding bikes experienced a fluctuating trend; it was popular among the youngest children (68%), dipped to 60% for the middle group, but became the most favored activity for teenagers aged 12–16, reaching just over 80%.

Examiner feedback

This is a very strong response that demonstrates a high level of linguistic control and logical organization. To reach Band 9, ensure perfect accuracy in identifying the highest/lowest values in the overview and maintain total fidelity to the prompt's factual details like dates.

Task Achievement - 8

- The response covers all requirements of the task, highlighting key features and providing specific data points. - A clear overview is provided, though it slightly misinterprets the ranking for the oldest group (riding bikes is highest, not equal with TV). - Data for all three age groups and all four activities are included and accurately reported from the visual.

Coherence & Cohesion - 8

- The message is followed with ease through a logical progression from the overview to specific data groups. - Paragraphing is used appropriately, grouping activities into logical pairs (Passive vs. Active/Gaming). - Cohesive devices such as 'Conversely', 'In contrast', and 'On the other hand' are used effectively without being intrusive.

Lexical Resource - 8

- A wide resource is used to convey precise meanings, with terms like 'cohorts', 'inverse relationship', and 'peaked'. - Lexical variety is evident in the description of data (e.g., 'dipped', 'dropped sharply', 'took part in'). - There is an occasional inaccuracy in the date (2018 instead of 2012) and activity naming, but the vocabulary itself is sophisticated.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy - 8

- A wide range of structures is used accurately, including complex comparisons and varied clause types. - The majority of sentences are error-free, with high control over punctuation. - Minor slips in verb choice (e.g., 'favored' for a percentage) do not detract from the overall high accuracy.

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